Infidelity in marriage is so prevalent. It’s almost as if monogamous marriages are a thing of the past. It’s sad because you have to wonder who can you trust. But one thing that really bothers me is women that are fully committed to married men. Am I the only one bothered by this? It’s not even something that is new. This has been going on for ages and I still don’t understand it.
This goes beyond an affair. Usually in an affair both parties know that it will someday come to an end. Either their relationships will be exposed or one or both parties get tired of sneaking around when they want to be together. Some affairs lead to one of the parties involved thinking that the other one will leave his or her spouse in order to pursue a relationship with them. It’s all wrong, but who am I to judge what other people do. I personally don’t feel this is what God intended for us. I believe God intended for us to all have our own spouses without having to share. That’s just my belief, maybe I’m the one that is wrong.
I want to know what makes a woman can get into a full relationship with a man that is married and lives at home with his wife and family and is fine with that? Please help me to understand. What could possibly possess a woman to be comfortable having a committed relationship with a man that makes you second. Do you not feel that you are worth more than that? Is it that difficult to find a man that you have to settle for a man that has a wife at home? When he leaves your house and goes home to his family, do you feel lonely? I really do not get it. I need someone to explain it to me.
There is already a common saying that all men are dogs. Women who allow this not only confirm this behavior, but they seem to admonish it. You are letting men know that there are women out there that will be perfectly fine with being married and having a woman on the side. You are telling a man that you don’t mind being second. You are telling a man he can have his cake and eat it too. No need for a divorce. It shouldn’t matter if he is supporting you financially or whatever you may think he is doing that you are so in love with. You are still making a mockery of marriage and monogamous relationships. You are better than that. Or am I wrong?
Even if you don’t care about being second put yourself in his wife’s shoes. She’s a woman just like you and no matter what’s going on in the household neither you or her deserves the treatment he is giving you. I’m sure he may be telling you some things about her that makes you think of her in a negative way. Maybe he’s telling you that he has to stay for some reason. Maybe he tells you he is only there for the kids. Or maybe there are other financial obligations he has with his wife. You can’t possibly believe this. The real fact is that he still loves his wife and he is not leaving her for you. You will always be second or maybe even third in his eyes. Is this something that makes you happy? Did you grow up wanting to be second?
I believe these relationships give both men and women a bad reputation. But for the most part it gives men more reason to disrespect women. A man is going to think that he can get away with being involved with more than one woman. This type of thinking is brought forth because there are so many women that accept it. I have heard so often women telling their husbands “Do whatever you do as long as you don’t bring it home.” This is basically giving him the green light to have extra-marital relationships. Of course he won’t bring it home. I think the real message should be, “You better be loyal or else there will be hell to pay.”
Some men will cheat. Some women will cheat… But there should be no promoting of this behavior. Women that get involved with married men promote this behavior. I may have sounded really confused in with many of the things I have said in this blog and the reason for that is because I AM confused. So please comment and tell me what you think about this. I am eager to know if this is a problem or am I just overreacting.